Epic Fail

Today feels like and epic fail.

A $70 epic fail.

I am really sick. And I needed help. I thought I was gonna buy help with that money or at least ease the way for the group as a whole. I thought I gave clear direction but I guess not. I don't have a great desire to be a pushy bitch.

limbo with a bad puppet master

but before I launch into a vent, I do have faith that there are some very nice people involved who will do their best.

But anyhow WSC called yesterday and said that I need to pick up my son by midnight tonight... love that notice... hmmm. Good stuff. They said that the insurance was denying any further benefit. Grrrr.

They are appealing the decision and I am trying to at least get them to extend till Ben get's here on the 8th. (though he doesn't get in till late and will be knackered) and to get them to approved for Herrick's day program. I won't know till today. At which point I will either have to try to get him on a holiday weekend.... grrrrrr. Or maybe see if Alex and Nicole could get him on the 5th on their way back up and just pay the bigggggggggggggggggggggg bucks to keep him there until then. God knows where the money is gonna come from.

Wow, isn't this gonna be fun.

Better Living through planning and help from kick ass friends

So I am writing this in order to take better care of myself and not fall apart. As we all know though follow through is everything.


Food for Rachel
Day one
2 hard boiled eggs
2 apples
Salad with a piece of protien the size of my hand and low sugar/fat dressing

Day two
2 apples
Salad with a piece of protien the size of my hand and low sugar/fat dressing
2 hard boiled eggs

Beverages
Water
Green Tea

I need to do this for at least two weeks then re-evaluate

Exercise for Me and Haz
Google calendar the classes at the Y I must take
Make Gym Bags Tonight


Basic Grocery List for 7 Days (Covers Me, Harrison and Ben)
4 whole chickens
4 lbs of some other meat/fish
4 bags (or 2 lbs) of mixed greens
4 tomatoes
2 doz eggs
14 apples
1lb butter
1 gallon milk
1 box cereal
1 loaf of bread
1 brick of cheese (cheddar or Jack)
2 pkg of pasta
1 pkg of rice
5 onions
5 lemons
1 pkg tortillas
2 pkg of beans
1 sack of garlic
2 bunches of cilantro
snacking fruit for boy
veggies for dinners

Staples bought every two weeks/1 per month
Soy sauce
sesame oil
splenda
tea
salt

Develop a schedule for who is going where and chores and such. Something like this for each day.

6am - 7am Rachel gets up, goes to work, takes gym bag and lunch
Xam - Xam Haz and ben get up, eat b-fast and get ready to go to Herrick
Xam - Xpm Haz at Herrick
Xpm - Xpm Ben to pick up Haz at Herrick and take to Y for XXXXXX
Xpm - Xpm Rachel at Y for class
Xpm - Xpm Rach arrives home, makes dinner, repacks gym bag, works, then packs lunch for next day, puts out fires

The moon is not only ice cold, it is here to stay - cat power

So the boy has been gone for 19 days now. It feels like a blink and like a year. I miss him. He was so blah on the phone last night though. I need to learn how to talk to him again. I was so worried about making him feel bad that I didn't talk about anything at all. I have no idea when him comes home. I miss the kid who watched movies with me. Or drew or talked about what he likes. I fear the nasty mouthed abusive child that is so like his father and my mother.

I need to write him today.