264.something

that was the returns this morning. Though I still feel really whaley and like a over stuff sausage about to burst. But it could all be in my head. No, just checked the waist band... still see the rolls. ick.

I know that all sounds so ultra self hateful etc. but it seems like this fat is just baggage of a less than easy life. This baggage is stuck to me right now. I am tired of carring it around. It is eating up way to much of my energy in the everyday and will most likely kill me in the end.

And I need that energy for parenting, art and the people in my life I care about and just some for myself. Phew. I am tired just thinking about it. I read an article about sleep today and pretty much agree I need more. Lots more.